Sally Fingerett

I’ve got a problem with my ass, thought I’d like to lose it fast
I heard about a diet plan, that’s gonna help me do this
Cayenne pepper, lemon juice - then you make a cabbage soup
There’s nothing here for me to chew, they must be kidding
I bought the stuff and I got to work, in the kitchen I’m a jerk
Surely I can make a soup in a 10 quart pot
It was pretty healthy I agree, looky here calorie free
Did I make it past day 3? No, no, no, no I think not! ​

CHORUS
I woulda, I coulda, I shoulda, but I didn’t
I didn’t, no, I didn’t, hmmmmm

I found a 24 hour gym, up all night - come on in
Insomniacs can now get thin, oh baby sign me up
I commit to get all buff and strong as
Soon as I’m done singing this song
I’m gonna hit the gym at the crack of dawn
And I’m not kidding
I’m up early moving slow, I bitch and moan, still I go
Maniacs with gym bags in tow, filling up the parking lot
I see pretty women and pretty guys
Pairs and pairs of perfect thighs
In my ratty sweats do I go inside?
No, no, no, no I think not! ​

CHORUS

I knew that I shoulda - almost I coulda
Really I woulda, except for because
I was gonna and I meant to I wanted when I went to
I realized I was supposed to
Somehow I no longer chose to!

I’m the boss of me, I’m oppositional
Telling me what to do is bull
I’ve got twenty voices inside my skull, negotiating
I’m a baby in a high chair banging my spoon
Doing only what I want to do
They’re telling me to grow up, I keep meaning to
I’m gonna get right on it

CHORUS

(Let our inner brat run free!)

©2012 Sally Fingerett, Green Fingers Music, BMI